g-unit said...
I'm banned from your blog vicariously by radar. I enjoyed it. One question, and ask radar, too, If one has a public blog, then why are most of them for family members only?
Gary Van Leeuwen
Gary does pose an interesting question I think what you are not realizing is that although a blog maybe public its intented audience may not be the general public and it may be written as a means to keep up with family and friends. I want people to be able to put comments on my blog and i wish for this to be an easy process which is why I have turned anonymous comments on and have left the validation means turned off. I feel that if someone wants to say something that they should be able do so and it should not be a hard process requiring the need to register or what not. However the issue that Gary is having is not an uncommon one on the web and stems from a bit of ignorance on certain aspects of netiquette. I think the general rule goes as follows
"If you dont have anything interesting to contribute shut your pie hole"
This Gary is where I think you are having issues. Peoples blogs are not intended to be your soap box to get attention which is what is seems you are trying to make them. There are plenty of forums online that would love to have you comments as a target for a flame war but a blog is not a forum to just post up whatever random thoughts you might have that day. A blog to me is like a online journal that you share with the world and allow them into your life in a way that they are probably not able to be whether by geography or other means. SO if Jason posts about how he wants the new asteroids watch from fossil (seriously dude check it out) you should not put up a comment about how you have a strange amount of lint in your belly button today. Its just that simple. For whatever reason though you just dont seem to get it. I dont care if you post to my blog as long as it stays on topic. However if its just random crap that you feel like saying, after seeing jason and radar's blogs and how they feel Im sorry but I will just delete your comments. SO those are my terms to you or anyone else in the net who would want to post. The sad thing is that with the exception of spammers most people dont need this spelled out for them.
14 comments:
Chris, this is Gary, and I fully understand. I never meant this love triangle to go that far; I never meant anyone to get offended. Maybe I just write funny, and expect people to read between the lines. Thanks for your comments, but I am not a bad person. I'm radar's neighbor, and I know Della and lots of people in their circle of friends. Maybe I am possessed with radar's knowledge and only wanted to learn things from him. He has also helped my with my past depression which I feel now I have conquered. That's why I feel somewhat hurt by him. And I admit, I do get a little off track sometimes. So I'm really sorry for interfering in the Pangean family. Now I am afraid to post anything. I'm a very emotional person who needs love just like most people. And just to prove I'm not retarded, I did erase all of the Pangean email addresses I had so not to screw up ever again because I can forgive and forget, and learn from mistakes. I feel radar owes me an apology, however.
Chris,
I think you've pretty well nailed it. Jaosn speaks very highly of you, which is enough to motivate me to try to knwo you better, but i've met you, what, twice?
I wanted to get to know who you are so i linked to your blog from mine and visit every few days to see what you write, but i haven't assumed that makes us family or friends.
Noting that you don't post on my blog and have not linked back to it from yours as i did the other direction, i concluded that you feel no form of connection to me. Fair enough, as much of what i believe strongly is in direct opposition to your own beliefs. I generally don't comment here out of respect for this being your space.
You are married to the half-sister of my son :-). We have very little else in common, except maybe the minor overlap in our career choices. I will continue monitoring your site, simply because Jason tells me that you totally rock (and cause you write well :-), but will generally maintain the same level of lurking as i have mainatained all along.
What I did was linked from this family's sites to each of your other family's sites, like radar said. I hope you all can find it in your hearts to forgive me; as I admit I was being rude, but I also got angry, which would be an excellent topic to wane.
Chris, this is very similar to some comments I left for G-Unit before:
"…as I said before, I only want comments which relate to the post to which they are attached. When you ask me a question in a video game thread about my apartment, it’s just not the right place for it. Or asking me for permission for you to show someone my blog. Do what you want, just keep the comments related to the post / discussion.”
I also brought up the fact that I do like it when new people come to my site. When I write up reviews for Japanese games which have yet to make it to the US (somewhat of a rarirty these days) I get all kinds of new people coming to my site - and I love it. But they discuss the game, or things very closely related to it (like perhaps asking if I got a previous game by the same developers or something of that ilk) instead of talking about the weather, the latest news on Wall Street or whatever.
Gary, I think perhaps if you would just back off, then you would get much less of an aggressive response as you have been getting. The fact that when you are asked to stop posting means that you start going to the sites linked form ours to everyone else's (the fact that you told Chris you were Della's friend only shows that you don't know Chris, as he has never even met Della) and start sharing your "pearls of wisdom" only demonstrates that you do not respect what the people whom you claim to be your friends.
Also, dude, you are an adult. Deal with your depression or whatever problems you have. I don't mind helping people with their problems, but your problem needs medical attention. (That's how smart people deal with depression.) If you still feel depressed after surfing everyone's sites and posting inane posts, then perhaps that would be a great indicator that that isn't the best therapy for you. Seriously, read some books or websites that deal with how to handle episodes of depression. I get depressed very often, and even have some other mental / emotional issues which I have been dealing with - but I have been putting the treatment of those problems in the right context - not just rambling on at other people's sites.
Also, I think if you spent less time browsing sites of people you don't know and trying to intrude on their lives when you clearly have next to no valuable input to provide and more time using the internet to find a job, or even tearing yourself away from the computer and finding a job, I think it would help you actually GET a job, which would do wonders for your self-esteem, measure of self-worth and depression.
Seriously, this is what it is like;
Chris throws an open party. Sure, most of the people there are people he knows, but some people who know him invited a few of their friends. And a few total strangers saw his flyer and came as well. Great... Chris has a nice party going. But then let's say a guy who doesn't know Chris, he's a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy who knows another guy who knows Chris comes, and starts walking up in the middle of everyone's conversations and starts talking about completely different topics. Maybe people would get annoyed, especially if that was pretty much all he did, and he went to everyone's open party - which will have some fresh faces, but are predominantly filled with people within the same circle of friends and family. Maybe those people would say "enough dude, you've worn out your welcome and we don't want you at our parties anymore". So then the guy starts showing up at other people's parties who are only slightly "related" to the people from the first set of parties and does the same thing. Or he shows up to an old party wearing a costume and pretends to be someone else and even has worthwhile conversations for three minutes, but reveals himself and says "Ha! I lied to you! It's me! I just wanted to prove I can have a decent conversation, but instead of rolling with it, I decided to show my true self, mostly because I couldn't resist the urge to start talking nonsense again." Maybe those people might call the cops or force him to leave.
Essentially, this is what you have been doing, but online - where there aren't really any police. But thanks to .htaccess files, we can have some pretty kickass bouncers at the door.
acknowledged
Guy and Darren have not chewed me out yet, ok, I'll leave you all alone -- my bad!
"Gary I hope you really take some of the things that people are telling you to heart. You can change and you can have people like Radar as your friend but you have to be willing to act like a civilized adult."
Dear Ruki, Thanks, I will heed your words. I am not the Monster Jason and radar are making me out to be. For God's sake, I'm a social worker who cares about others, I have two degrees but I'm a modest feller and I still admire radar and jason and have apologized to them on several occassions, and will stop all this nonsense, unless I have a on-the-topic comment. I think I was just trying to show these guys that they are not perfect in any way, but quite smart, that's what I like about them. And you'll find that Della is very nice, too, and quite insightful! I'm not too good at humor I guess, as radar has told me. C-ya, welcome home, or was that Darren ._.
Hmm..human nature is really strange. Chris posts a lot of great pictures of his vacation, and that gets 5 comments. Chris posts some comments about netiquette, and receives 8 comments, including this one. This seems to indicate that negative posts get more feedback than positive posts. (Yes, that statement is a product of flawed reasoning.) Maybe if I want more comments on my blog, I should start being a little more controversial in my topics!
I agree with most of your netiquette chris. It becomes even more essential in a forum situation. It's really just common sense...
HAHA! you said "netiquette"!
"I think I was just trying to show these guys that they are not perfect in any way"
Uhm. First of all, none of us ever said we were perfect, nor have we portrayed that in some indirect way. And secondly, how is it that making an ass of yourself by annoying people, talking pure gibberish and / or lying to people proves that those other people are not perfect?
I am curious.
I don't know what I lied to people about. I'm done, before I have a nervous breakdown. And, I'm not an annoying ass hole, that is so rude and immature. This game of animals is over! Pigs, sheep and dogs. God help us!
"I don't know what I lied to people about."
Really? How about when you went to my Dad's site and logged on under the name Patricia Patterson (or whatever it was) and carried on a conversation, and then said "Ha! I fooled you all! I'm not really Patricia, but Gary!" Sounds like a lie - which makes you a liar - carried out to piss people off - which makes you annoying. I think coupling those two together would make it easy for many to assume you to be an asshole.
And saying you'll go away, leave us alone, or that you're done, and then coming back every day and posting more about it shows you won't go away, leave us alone be done, also making you out to be a liar.
Finally, the fact that you insinuate that I am a dog, pig or sheep only shows that - coupled with your proclivity to annoy everyone even only tangentially related to my father - you are overwhelmingly immature. If me calling you out on your annoying traits or your lying makes me immature, then sure... I'm immature.
Whatever dude. Get help.
Chris, this is Della. I have never been to your site. I did not feel the need until now. I just want to apologize to you for any inconvenience you may have suffered because of the use of my name, or my friendship with someone who cannot seem to control himself in a personal situation. I think you have gotten the true "gist" of this situation, and you are right on the money with what you tell Gary here. You seem like a kind and compassionate person, and that is exactly the kind of person needed to help Gary through his current crisis. It's too bad that he has pissed off others who might have helped him also. I will not comment any more on your site, because we have never met, and you don't know me from Adam, but I wanted to let you know that I need not be judged by the "company I sometimes keep". Please do not give the comments referring to me any consequence just because they refer to me. I am not the sum of someone else's opinion of me. Thank you. Della.
Post a Comment